KILL KEITH

by Mark'd Commode

5 out of 10

Release Date: 11th November 2011

Director: Andy Thompson

Cast: Marc Pickering, Susannah Fielding, David Easter, Simon Phillips, Stephen Chance, Ellie Jacobs, Vanessa Feltz and Keith Chegwin with Joe Pasquale, Tony Blackburn and Russell Grant

Writer: Andy Thompson

Trailer: KILL KEITH 

Kill-Keith-DVDIf expectations are at their lowest before watching a certain film, is it inevitable that we’ll be pleasantly surprised on viewing it?  Well, after taking the accounting into well, account Kill Keith is still a bad film but it’s not a stinker.  It’s nowhere near the stinker I was expecting but by comparison to other recent UK comedies it’s actually fairly enjoyable.  I was also surprised at how much I like Keith Chegwin.  I used to see all his shows growing up in the late 70s and early 80s but his career re-birth on breakfast TVin the 90s  passed me by.  I think seeing him again and watching how he grips this role with both hands, acting for all he’s worth have earned the film a lot of good will on my part.  He’s not in the movie all the much but Kill Keith certainly becomes more vibrant when he’s about.  So there we are, embarrassing man-crush rediscovered.  Cheggers was my lost childhood hero! OK to the plot.

Cliff (DAVID EASTER – BROOKSIDE) is leaving the TV Breakfast Show “Up At The Crack Of Dawn”.  Dawn (SUSANNAH FIELDING – THE KNOT), his fellow anchor is due a new celebrity replacement.  Studio runner Danny (MARC PICKERING – THE TASK) has a really big crush on Dawn and Keith Chegwin (as himself) is their man in the field, with raids on unsuspecting families to give them the chance of winning prizes, Cheggars Can’t Be Choosers for instance.  Unfortunately for all concerned there is a serial murderer, badly dubbed the Breakfast Cereal Killer, who is offing famous TV presenters like Tony Blackburn and Joe Pasquale.  Who can it be?  As mass panic spreads and famous faces who happen to be in line for Cliff’s job either go to ground or are despatched in a cornflake or porridge inspired death.  Dawn turns out to be quite the damsel in distress for Danny, who in turn ruins every opportunity to come out smelling of roses.  Some of the humour hits the mark and Marc Pickering makes for a great comedy leading man. He’s a strange looking guy, but also photogenic at the same time. His Danny is very watchable and on the whole carries off the role well.

As a comedy, Kill Keith is patchy but still has some invention.  Moments of slapstick litter proceedings and it’s very much a product of the school of cringe.  A cardboard cut out of Dawn leads to an crushingly  embarrassing moment for him and the moment a character headers a stapler like a football is a highlight in idiocy.  There’s also a surreal edge to the movie, one of the staff may just be a ‘vampire’ and Tony Blackburn is played by a guy in his 20s (JOE FRANCINI), whilst his decoy is played by the real Tony Blackburn?  The fictional Keith Chegwin betrays a razor sharp yet gallows humour when questioned about the deaths of fellow celebs.  The identity of the killer will come as no surprise and is an early reveal so there’s zero mystery.  I mean could it be David Easter (who really wants to stay?), Simon Phillips‘ (AIRBORNE) biscuit eating cleaner or even Cheggers? Will Danny get the girl? Well the denouement is very surreal, sloppily executed but also strangely surreal.  There’s also great superficial fun to be had  from seeing fictional takes of well-known celebrities playing bitter, swearing and jaded versions of themselves.  Joe Pasquale in particular is great fun in a brief turn in a Monkey costume. My favourite assassination of the year in the movies I think.

5 out of 10 – Kill Keith aims for cult-favour but it’s just too small-scale and not quite original enough. Keith Chegwin is great and the principal cast don’t seem to be that embarrassed t be there.  I think film snobbery snuffed this movie at birth because there’s lots of dumb fun to be had.  It’s not a good film by any stretch. The editing and directing is anonymous and it looks cheap.  Good on a very game cast and some unusual celebrities who prove they are game for a laugh.  Maybe Cheggers should be follow up Kill Keith with more acting roles. A good attempt but not quite the classic it could have been. But I don’t know what was missing to be honest….

WHAT HAVE I SEEN THAT PERSON IN BEFORE?

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